And Shun the Frumious Bandersnatch!
Ho there!
Godzilla coming to you, underdead, from the computer room of the house I live in. Even if I were alive I would certainly feel out of sorts right now. I should probably hit the sack and soon. I am very glad, however, that I didn't nap this afternoon or early evening. I tell ya, I may not have much fear of a Jubjub, or even a frumious Bandersnatch -- but ONE lousy, stinkin' cricket sure made my exitence pretty miserable today.
'Tis bad enough that my insomnia keeps me up sometimes even when I am tired and need to sleep I just can't. 'Twas the case last night. I tried at 10:30 to go to bed. No dice. So I got up and tried again at 11:30, no dice. So I got up and took over the world (Hey Kong, you still play Galactic Battlegrounds at all?) as the Trade Federation no less. So about 1 this morning I finally decide I'm going to bed and staying there, like it or not.
NOT.
Somewhere under my bed is a cricket who must have smurf ancestry in it somewhere to be that annoying. It was driving me sane. Made me want to leave Monster Island and go invade France and do a jig in Paris... ya know one or two good shoves on the arc d'triuimph, an atomic breath blast at the Louvre, that sort of thing.
I tried to block it out, no luck. I tried thinking about something else. No dice. One suggestion that sometimes does work is start thinking of an animal at the zoo beginning with A and going on. I couldn't even do that. Cricket Chirping was SOOO annoying. Do they make cricket motels -- you know where crickets check in but can't check out because they're dying horrific deaths of starvation and dehydration? Might have to check into that.
So finally I took one of my pillows and pulled it over my head. WHAT? Silence? Blessed Silence.... so I took the pillow off my face and heard the darn cricket. Did I have a solution? You might think so. HA. Joke's on me -- ever try and sleep with a pillow on your head? I don't usually sleep on my back, and even if I did, I generally like to have unobstructed breathing passageways. So I'm trying to find a position I might be able to sleep in, balancing a pillow on my head enough to block out the cricket and still breathe comfortably.
I've been juggling for years. More than half my life. I'm not into a lot of tricks, I don't do more than 3 objects, I am certainly not limber enough anymore to go behind the back or under a leg... but I juggle fairly well otherwise. I really enjoy my torches and knives. I can't be completly lacking in dextrousness... and yet it is much easier to juggle torches and knives than it was for me to balance that sleeping act. I am pretty aware of how well it didn't work because several more times in the wee hours of the morn that marched to their doom like anyone invading Russia knows I woke to the chirping of one very annoying little cricket.
And so it goes. The alarm goes off. I actually turned it off and took the extra 15 minutes before my second alarm goes off. Not that it helped a whole lot. Ah well, it's over, it's done, bed time comes upon me soon and as I didn't nap I should be able to tell my body to get it's silly self to go to sleep. Just PLEASE, no more crickets!
I'll invite the Bandersnatch over for Sunday dinner before I like crickets.
Until next time--
~Gojira
Godzilla coming to you, underdead, from the computer room of the house I live in. Even if I were alive I would certainly feel out of sorts right now. I should probably hit the sack and soon. I am very glad, however, that I didn't nap this afternoon or early evening. I tell ya, I may not have much fear of a Jubjub, or even a frumious Bandersnatch -- but ONE lousy, stinkin' cricket sure made my exitence pretty miserable today.
'Tis bad enough that my insomnia keeps me up sometimes even when I am tired and need to sleep I just can't. 'Twas the case last night. I tried at 10:30 to go to bed. No dice. So I got up and tried again at 11:30, no dice. So I got up and took over the world (Hey Kong, you still play Galactic Battlegrounds at all?) as the Trade Federation no less. So about 1 this morning I finally decide I'm going to bed and staying there, like it or not.
NOT.
Somewhere under my bed is a cricket who must have smurf ancestry in it somewhere to be that annoying. It was driving me sane. Made me want to leave Monster Island and go invade France and do a jig in Paris... ya know one or two good shoves on the arc d'triuimph, an atomic breath blast at the Louvre, that sort of thing.
I tried to block it out, no luck. I tried thinking about something else. No dice. One suggestion that sometimes does work is start thinking of an animal at the zoo beginning with A and going on. I couldn't even do that. Cricket Chirping was SOOO annoying. Do they make cricket motels -- you know where crickets check in but can't check out because they're dying horrific deaths of starvation and dehydration? Might have to check into that.
So finally I took one of my pillows and pulled it over my head. WHAT? Silence? Blessed Silence.... so I took the pillow off my face and heard the darn cricket. Did I have a solution? You might think so. HA. Joke's on me -- ever try and sleep with a pillow on your head? I don't usually sleep on my back, and even if I did, I generally like to have unobstructed breathing passageways. So I'm trying to find a position I might be able to sleep in, balancing a pillow on my head enough to block out the cricket and still breathe comfortably.
I've been juggling for years. More than half my life. I'm not into a lot of tricks, I don't do more than 3 objects, I am certainly not limber enough anymore to go behind the back or under a leg... but I juggle fairly well otherwise. I really enjoy my torches and knives. I can't be completly lacking in dextrousness... and yet it is much easier to juggle torches and knives than it was for me to balance that sleeping act. I am pretty aware of how well it didn't work because several more times in the wee hours of the morn that marched to their doom like anyone invading Russia knows I woke to the chirping of one very annoying little cricket.
And so it goes. The alarm goes off. I actually turned it off and took the extra 15 minutes before my second alarm goes off. Not that it helped a whole lot. Ah well, it's over, it's done, bed time comes upon me soon and as I didn't nap I should be able to tell my body to get it's silly self to go to sleep. Just PLEASE, no more crickets!
I'll invite the Bandersnatch over for Sunday dinner before I like crickets.
Until next time--
~Gojira
posted by Godzilla at 8:22 PM
1 Comments:
May I recommend that you swing by Wal-Mart and pick up a package of Hearos? They're the best ear plugs around, IMHO. And believe you me, I've tried them all, being myself a less than skilled pillow balancer. Save the extra sets of plugs for the future Mrs. Godzilla. If you snore anything like some of the other fellas in our family, she's going to need them. Hey, that's the second exasperated cricket story I've heard tonight. Funny. Love ya, cuz. Hope you get a better night's sleep tonight. Durn bug.
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